So I was meandering around Home Depot when an old lady asked “Can you help me lift this box sonny?”
“Sorry, I forgot to take my Celebrex,” I said.
Then I saw my ex-wife. “How are the kids?” I asked.
“I don’t have kids.”
“You don’t? We fucked from one end of Albuquerque to the other.”
“Do I know you sir?”
So I went to take a shit. I dropped my pants and sat on the toilet when a strange man said “dad, that’s a display!”
Then it occurred to me: I also forgot to take my Razadyne. 🤷♂️