Meet William Shitz (part x)

“I found him!” Allen Funt screamed through the torrential rain. It was our second day of hunting for the surprisingly evasive Mr. Shitz. The terrain in the sprawling forest proved to be formidable. Archibald, shotgun in hand, ran towards Allen’s screams. Darla and myself weren’t far behind. “Where is he?” Archibald asked as he approached. … Continue reading Meet William Shitz (part x)

my fav nfl moment

I woke up in a roar this morning cuz I suddenly remembered that time Aqib Talib poked Dwayne Allen in the eye on national TV: The Denver Broncos eventually lost, but I think we can agree:

another blippi BANGER

Square, circle, star, diamond, octagon, pentagon…goddamn I love this song: What? Is a grown ass man not allowed to like kid’s songs? My son and I jam to this all damn day. Just admit it: this tune SLAPS! Plus, I think we can all agree. Those dance moves… They’re pretty good.

Meet bill shits (part ix)

“He’s close,” Archibald said as he dug his fingers into the soil. “How can you tell?” I asked. “There’s a steaming pile of bloody shit right there,” he replied. I looked to the right and lo and behold, right there a reeking pile of human poop. “It seems like you’ve done this many times before,” … Continue reading Meet bill shits (part ix)

Meet William shits (part vii)

“The arctic fox spends its days burrowing underground and avoiding contact with its own kind,” Mr. Shitz explained while staring down the sights of his shotgun. “It’s a solitary animal, much like myself. When it dies, it dies alone.” Mr. Shitz pulled the trigger, unleashing the sound of hell. A helpless fox, only a few … Continue reading Meet William shits (part vii)

meet William Shitz (part vi)

“Don’t tell anyone that we fucked,” Darla said as she climbed naked out of bed. “I can’t think of anything more embarrassing than sleeping with the gardener.” “I understand,” I replied. “By the way,” she asked as she strapped on her brassiere, “how do you know my father has ass cancer?” I began to stutter. … Continue reading meet William Shitz (part vi)

sry again

Bad news: I’m an AVgeek. I REALLY love airports and airplanes and shit. Don’t give a fuck abt blogging anymore 🤷‍♂️ But honestly, that’s prolly for the best. Don’t know when I’ll be back Bye 👋


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