I frantically called up Dan after receiving the horrendous news from Greta. “Did you hear that Greta is getting 100% of the merchandising rights from Chatty Cathy?” I shouted over the phone.
“Will you relax?” he explained. “I have a plan.”
“You’re my de facto agent, so you better have a plan!”
“We’re going to kill Greta.”
“What?!”
“In the press.”
I breathed a sigh of relief. “What did you dig up on her?” I ask.
“She’s a tyrant on set James! 20 seconds of research will tell you that.”
I scratched my head. “I don’t know Dan,” I said. “I’ve been called that too but I’m still working.”
“But you have five times more accolades than her. You’re able to get away with it.”
I wasn’t so sure. “I’m gonna level with you Dan, I don’t like this plan at all,” I told him.
“Look, I know that we don’t have much leverage in this case so clearly this will be a slow burn. But we gotta use what we have. Maybe a few months of endless hounding from the press will force her to resign. Afterwards, contracts will be renegotiated and I’ll get you full control of merchandising rights. It’s the best we got!”
TO BE CONTINUED…
The Internet Ruined Everything 