Smokin in the Smokies

So I was with my mom and dad in the Smoky Mountains when, for whatever reasons, I decided to get high. Much of my memory is shoddy after that, but I do remember stopping off at some mill. I don’t know why that mill was a popular stopping point for tourists (I guess that’s where Robert E. Lee sucked off Ulysses S Grant to end the Civil War (that’s how they ended wars back in those days. Look it up)) but I had to take a piss. I went into the bathroom and started chuckling over some stupid joke in my head when a dude in an Alabama Crimson Tide shirt starting pissing in the urinal next to me. There was also a guy absolutely shitting his ass out on the toilet. The Alabama guy kept looking over at me like I was some weirdo and I then I started uncontrollably laughing because I thought that HE thought I was laughing at the dude shitting his ass out.

The we stopped at a babbling brook. Everyone was standing around in awe at this beautiful sight, but all I can think of are those people that use nature as “proof of god”. Then I thought it would be funny if there was an atheist who had no understanding of science who used nature as proof that there was no god, so he just bitches nonstop at National Parks for how stupid and ugly they are. I dunno, I thought it was funny.

Anyway, that’s the story. The end.