
I’m always tired.
So, so tired.
I was playing skee ball at Chuck E Cheese when Ed started hootin and hollerin.
“Don’t make me drop your ass kid! I’m packing my 9mm,” he said. Ed was getting the tables ran on him by a 2nd grader.
“Pipe down Ed,” I said.
“This is bullshit!”
I went back to minding my own business when a father confronted Ed.
“I will shove this skee ball right up your ass if you talk to me like that again!” Ed said to the man.
“Say, let’s settle down and have another beer Ed,” I said.
So we went back to our table, enjoyed some pizza, and watched the animatronics. Then Ed pulled out a pipe.
“Wanna do some crack?”
I reluctantly agreed, but it turned me into a beast at air hockey.
“Aren’t you guys too old to be at a Chuck E Cheese?” some mom asked us.
“Shut the fuck up bitch!” Ed replied as he threw the hockey pusher at her face.
The manager told us to leave.
“The problem with today’s kids is that no one beats the shit out of them anymore!” Ed yelled at the top of his lungs.
He then went on stage and pissed all over Munch’s Make Believe Band.
“Fuck this place!” Ed said. “We’re going to Dave & Busters!”