Tag: Palm Springs

And yet another shot at the title (part xxi)

All was quiet under the scorching sun. The lone, naked shrub still lay undisturbed in the barren Palm Springs desert. I watched a coyote forage around then piss on a Joshua Tree. Not even he would bother this useless piece of vegetation that clung onto life in this waterless land.

Everything around me rang of death. Yet here I was. There was the coyote. There was the piddly, useless shrub. Despite all odds, despite the elements wishing death upon us, we survived.

At least I survived this time.

Perhaps the gods did smile upon me, I thought. The devil in these matters…the Hollywood snakes with their venom, as the vipers are to the coyote in this wasteland…are of no match to destiny. Perhaps Dick was wrong. I was a predator. In this sense, I was more akin to the coyote than the shrub. I was the lone wolf. And the executives were my prey.

I took out my penis and pissed on the shrub.

“Providing the shrub substance I see,” Dick said.

I swung around. “Yes,” I said.

Dick approached and grabbed me by the shoulders. “I see you were victorious,” he smiled.

“I want you to come back to Hollywood with me.”

Dick looked to the sand below him and smiled that warm smile. “Are you sure that’s wise?” he asked.

“I’m back in the director’s chair,” I said. “But the fight isn’t over.”

“The fight is never over,” he warned.

“I couldn’t have done this without you. I’m strong but not strong enough. They’ll never stop coming for me.”

Dick nodded and looked up to the burning sun. “If I were to come with you,” he said, “then I want a producer’s credit and 10% of the gross.”

TO BE CONTINUED…

And yet another shot at the title (part iii)

“Hi, I’m Dick,” said the big, burly naked man. “Welcome to my humble abode in Palm Springs.”

“Pleased to meet you Dick. I’m James,” I replied as I extended my hand.

“Yes, the world famous filmmaker. Care for a hug?”

“Thanks Dick. But I’m not comfortable with that.”

“Come on James. The first step in learning about yourself is embracing a nude man with an erection. So what do you say? Are you ready to take that first step?”

So I begrudgingly wrapped my arms around him and placed my head on his bare chest. “That’s much better, James. You are on your first steps towards healing,” he said.

“Can I let go now?”

“Of course, please take a seat.”

Dick directed me to a large pillow sitting on the hardwood floor. I plopped down while he sat in a large reclining chair, legs spread wide open; penis staring at me in the face. “So what brings you here?” he asks.

“Sometimes I feel like god is punishing me by keeping me alone in the world. Did I do something wrong? Am I cursed to live this way forever?”

Dick placed his elbows on the arms of the chair and raised his hands up to his lips in a prayer formation. “Hmm…,” he pondered, “the question that plagues all men. But I have an answer for you, James: yes you are cursed. How could anyone love a sad sack of shit like you? Look at you, sitting there on the floor like a child. Pathetic.”

“Is there any hope for me?”

“Hope…hope…,” Dick thought then shook his head. “There is no hope in the universe. Justice is a concept for the weak. For the strong don’t rely on hope. We take action.”

“What must I do?” I pleaded.

“It’s not what you must do. It’s what you must become,” he stated. Then he stood up to look out the window. Only his bare ass cheeks were facing me. Then he continued. “If you are to learn one thing from me, it’s this: you are a force of nature. Look out into this barren, deserted landscape. The lack of water and extreme heat invites nothing but death. Yet despite this, life persists. Look at that shrub.”

Dick pointed his finger at the lone piece of vegetation sitting in his view against the scorching Palm Springs backdrop. “This shrub receives less than one inch of water per year,” he stated. “It sits there alone its whole life. It provides no sustenance; it bears no fruit, it’s naked. No animal will touch as it’s not worth pissing on. But despite all the odds, it persists. And for what purpose? No one knows.”

Then Dick swung his penis around and looked me square in the eye. “Come,” he invited, “come be the lone, naked shrub in Palm Springs.”

TO BE CONTINUED…