Tag: New Mexico

The College Football Uniform Playoff (Part II-Mountain West)

Okay, so maybe the SEC isn’t the weakest conference. The Mountain West also has painfully boring uniforms. For background purposes, The MWC currently hosts 12 schools in football.

12. Nevada-Reno

I feel absolutely nothing for this uniform. It’s less than boring. It creates a black hole in my imagination that’s large enough for Matthew McConaughey to fall into.

11. Utah State

This is only a slight elevation from making me contemplate death to just plain boring.

10. Hawaii

I don’t know, this just feels like a missed opportunity to do something more creative. I love the logo. The all black style is pretty dope too. But I guess this just fits in with the rest of the MWC blandness.

9. Fresno State

Yeah, I’ve got nothin.

8. Nevada-Las Vegas

For a program that was taking applications for head coach through Indeed, the uniforms aren’t too shabby. And for the record, yes UNLV rejected my application.

7. Air Force

Blue and white is a crisp look but that bolt logo is a bit amateurish. They’d be better off just putting numbers on the side of the helmets.

6. New Mexico

‘Lobos’ is a cool-ass name. While the uniform looks good, I feel like I’ve seen this red too many times in this conference.

5. Wyoming

Brown and yellow sounds like a combination that shouldn’t work but it does here. My biggest gripe though is the cheapass font.

4. San Diego State

At first glance this looks like another run-of-the-mill MWC outfit. But it’s actually got a lot going for it. The logo is awesome. Aztecs are cool. And the red sleeves with the black body is totally bitchin.

3. San Jose State

The Los Angeles Rams should take note here on how to make this color scheme look good. The blue and yellow are bold enough alone, so there’s no need to do too much. The colors speak for themselves. Plus, totally awesome logo.

2. Colorado State

This one might be an acquired taste but the green and gold works for me. Since the LA Rams totally fucked up their helmet logo, CSU Rams now have the best ram helmet. But green is an another underrated color that more teams should utilize.

1. Boise State

These uniforms absolutely hurt my eyes, but in a good way. And respect to their blue field. Only those with strong eyes can stand to watch an entire game. So congratulations to the Boise State Broncos for making the playoffs.

Ranking the 50 States (the good states)

Like I said, every state has a part of it that I absolutely HATE. But if you’re living in one of these places (except for the bottom two) life is probably pretty good.

19. Kentucky

You either get the Bluegrass State or you don’t. Most claim it to be a southern state. Some say otherwise. But I like that ambiguity. It gives the COMMONWEALTH its own distinct flavor.

18. Missouri

To me, Missouri is decidedly and unambiguously NOT a southern state as much as it desires to be. But that’s neither here nor there. KC is legit. Other than the Ozarks on the southern portion, there might not be much else there. But at least they got KC.

17. Georgia

Atlanta is another legit city. Probably the best in the south. While it might be the Confederate Flag capital of the US, if you can ignore all of that, it’s actually a really charming place.

16. New Mexico

This is actually another state I’d like to rank higher. But other than Albuquerque, Taos, and Santa Fe (or Roswell if you’re a weirdo), there’s a whole lot of NOTHING occupying this place.

15. Minnesota

I feel like I’ve already mentioned this state, but whatever. It’s quietly one of the prettiest places. The only knock against it is that it contains Minnesota Vikings fans and it gets really fucking cold.

14. Maine

People are a little odd, but other than that, it’s pretty ace. Marylanders like to brag about their lobsters and crabs or whatever, but they ain’t shit compared to Maine.

13. New York

Cities along the western edge are a little iffy. But the rest of the state could be a nuclear wasteland and it would still rank this high thanks to NYC.

12. Nevada

Now Nevada IS mostly a nuclear wasteland, but I rank it above NY because…between Las Vegas and Reno, with all its cheap glitz, glam, and shattered dreams…it seems like I’d fit in much better there.

11. Tennessee

Sure the cost of living has skyrocketed, but make no mistake: whatever you’re looking for, you’ll find it in Tennessee. Now Nashville likes to consider itself a “party town” on par with Las Vegas, New Orleans, and Miami…and it’s DEFINITELY not that. Nevertheless it’s a pretty solid town. Sure it’s a little rough around the edges, but give it a few years and Tennessee will probably be a top 10 state.