When we think of “the greatest movies never made”, what usually comes to mind is Stanley Kubrick’s Napoleon, or Alejandro Jodorowsky’s Dune, Tim Burton’s Superman Lives, etc etc. But for me, it’s a movie that got made but it missed an unforgivable opportunity: Moonraker with Marlon Brando cast as Hugo Drax.

Moonraker, along with A View to a Kill and Die Another Day, is often considered the worst James Bond movie of all time. At least it’s thought of in that way to the average moviegoer. But for true Bond fans, it’s the ultimate guilty pleasure. Try watching the earlier Daniel Craig films then watch Moonraker and you’ll see how utterly batshit it is. But it’s so over-the-top that you eventually respect it.

Now I know that Michael Lonsdale’s portrayal of Hugo Drax is mostly well received. Sure, his villainous plan is bonkers but at least he was menacing. I personally felt that his acting was too wooden but he did give a respectable effort. But my question for Cubby Broccoli and the producers is “if you’re gonna shoot for the stars, why not get a star as your main villain?”. To my knowledge, Brando was never even in the discussion. Of course, Broccoli was notoriously cheap about certain things, which is why Industrial Light & Magic didn’t do the special effects (regrettably). This was at a time when Brando was commanding millions of dollars for only a few days of work. But with the life of Brando re-entering the public consciousness with Billy Zane playing him in an upcoming biopic, perhaps we’re only now realizing how flexible Brando might’ve been in negotiations.

Though in his mid-50s, Brando was still in his horndog phase by the late 1970s. Bond films notoriously had beautiful women running around set. Of course this might have set the stage for a possible MeToo moment (or maybe not since Brando felt like he was taken advantage of during Last Tango in Paris where the director made him show his penis in some deleted scenes), plus he probably still had the reputation for causing problems and delays in production. BUT, knowing what I know about Cubby Broccoli, the legendary producer would have treated Brando like royalty. Combine this with the fact that Hugo Drax has very little physical movement in the film and his weight would have been concealed by the Nehru suit, it seems like Brando might have lowered his usual rate of $2 million to $1 million for a few weeks of work. It definitely would have been easier than Apocalypse Now 🤷‍♂️

And Brando’s tendency to audible out of the script and direction would have fit the Roger Moore-era perfectly. Instead of being a run-of-the-mill villain, with Marlon Brando as Hugo Drax, Bond’s antagonist would have been an eccentric billionaire who was beyond reason. So what if one of the world’s greatest actors showed up to the set in drag?! We’re sending James Bond into space for fuck’s sake!