Nothing makes me happier than seeing a washed up John Calipari donning the Razorback red.

To all my haters: you know who you are. I walked the streets of Fayetteville, proudly wearing Big Blue Nation garb. The Wildcats would storm into Bud Walton Arena and stomp Hog ass year after year. Then I’d have to suffer the shouts of “Fuck John Calipari and the Commonwealth of Kentucky” from Razorback fans…year after year. Well now the tables have turned.

The University of Kentucky men’s basketball club, perhaps the proudest basketball club in the NCAA, has been in purgatory for nearly a decade mostly thanks to the once great John Calipari. Realizing that he overstayed his welcome, he did me a favor and jumped ship to the bane of my existence: the Arkansas Razorbacks. Many Arkansas fans may see this as a win, but every Kentucky fan knows that this will only ensure that the Razorbacks will continue to dwell in tournament hell.

The curse that I have laid upon the University of Arkansas has been a rousing success. I promise…nay, GUARANTEE….that the Razorbacks will never win another championship as long as I live. You can take that to the BANK.